Whatever gets you through the night...

My family and I attended a memorial service this weekend. It's been a minute since I was in a church, with any luck it will be quite a while longer before I'm back. Confirmation of your beliefs, or more to the point, lack thereof, can be a bit jarring. Loud, brutal thoughts stomped through my skull, "They do know it's 2023 right?", "Who wrote this?" After, we were standing in the lobby glancing about at various bits of "literature" and decor that seemed anything but "Christian". Don't get it, never have.

I could rant, and I have, extensively about the hypocrisy of the embracers of faith. But why? It's certainly not a religious exclusive. The human animal is a marvelously, complicatedly flawed, mixed bag of meat and poo. We're all just trying figure out how to fill in the slow bits, between the good parts, until the show's over. It just seems you oughta follow your own rule book if that's the game you're gonna play...just sayin'. Maybe start with "Love thy Neighbor" or "Do unto others"...something simple.

Have Fun.

Smiles for miles! But did they count?

 Took off on a pedal around the neighborhood this morning. Did all my usual neighborhood ride prep stuff, checked tires, filled water bottle, got my earbuds, activated my Trailforks app to record my mileage and route.

I try to never take the exact same route each time. I keep certain sections on every ride, but link them differently. Mix it up, change the scenery, don't look like the weird neighbor casing the place...that sorta thing.

It felt a little cooler than the thermometer indicated, but other than that...a SPECTACULAR day. Beautiful, I was happy to be in it. Pedaled hard through flats, enjoyed the rush of downhills, even the climbs were good. The only way the ride could have been better was if it weren't on the road, but any ride is a good ride, and I'll take all I can get.

Back home, ride is done. AMPED! Based off previous, similar, but different routes, I figured it was a 13 to 15 miler! Not too shabby for single speed mountain bike on the road. Dismount, fish my phone out of my pocket to check my appraisal, pull up the app, and...I DIDN'T ACTUALLY HIT "START"! WTF?!?! Ride wasn't recorded.

I felt myself deflate a little. Bummed. Why? The ride happened, I enjoyed it IMMENSELY. Did the lack of digital confirmation somehow remove validation? "If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" The philosopher George Berkeley pondered this in the 1600s, he believed yes it did, because God heard it.

I'm no believer, but I do have an inexplicable, and somewhat insatiable, need for validation...

So...maybe...

Nah...

Still not a believer. It happened, I know it, MORE than good enough. Self validation? What a concept!

Have Fun!

Days later...

 So previously I said I would start doing some "journaling" here. This is literally the 4th attempt, 6 days later. I think what it comes down to is the word "journaling"...it sounds an awful lot like "work". While not at all afraid of work, things that "seem" like work that aren't, have never been held in the highest regard by me. Work is work. If it was fun, they wouldn't call it that...they'd call it fun, duh. You wouldn't ever hear, "Ugh...Monday...gotta go back to FUN."

I feel the same way about exercise. Don't call it that! I've been riding my bike a lot lately. LOVE it. It's FUN! Exercise is simply a pleasant by-product of the FUN.

Back to "journaling". The term also implies, to me, I should be jotting down all my deepest and darkest bits. I've done that, and while incredibly important to get out, who wants to live in the dark? So dear reader(s), how 'bout this...I ain't gonna think of it as "journaling" any more. I'm gonna write to express myself, say what I want to say. Gee...no one on the internet does that, this is some groundbreaking stuff here!

To my friend Bob...It is good to be alive! Thanks for radiating your joy.

Have FUN!

So, there's this...

Hey there Bat Fans! Miss me?

It was brought to my attention lately that I should journal as an aid to dealing with anxiety, and all the other bats in the ol' brain belfry. When I first started the exercise, I did it analog as prescribed and recommended. Those initial entries came from safe to say, less than bright and shiny places. They are out now, and that is good, and I feel better for it.

I've been lax since then. Felt better, why bother? Sad to say, "Upkeep" is not one of my finer traits. I'm working on it...by doing this...

Random Rambling.

Back to work...

Ok, so the title was just a tease. Not really back to work in the grand sense of punching "the man's (or woman's, or person's...no bias, just a figure of speech) time clock", but getting back to hustling. Even "hustling" may be a bit grandiose of a term for what I've got going on. I'm doing a bit of freelance for a buddy's shop (GTown Cap Co.), fun stuff...keeps the chops sharp, I dig it. Mainly though, I'm working on my own stuff. You can, obviously, see my stuff from the main page portfolio bit, but I'm also on Threadless and Redbubble. Neither of these have yet to set the world on fire, but I'm plugging away and actively contributing and trying to figure out the whole "marketing of self" bit. That part is actually the hardest. I'm happy as a clam to do my doodles and designs, etc. but getting it out there in front of people with open wallets is way harder work for me, for sure. I was hoping for the "if you build it, they will come" trip...but Kevin Costner has yet to appear to make that magic happen, so I reckon it's about figuring out the ugly business part of being an "artist". Even this far down life's road, I still find it moderately preposterous to even call myself that. Artists wear berets or something like that, right?

More than anything else, this post was mostly about making this first post. So...BANG! There it is. Now, back to the grind.

Have Fun!